The Nightingale and her Flame

She lit me.. I was very little.

Hardly visible. Hardly there.

I loved to dance from the moment i was born

And then i heard her sweet voice.

She sang in my Father’s praise.

And she sang and sang, like a nightingale in love

My heart flew and grew. My heart leapt as i heard her

She continued as if she had no care in the world.

And i danced in glory, i danced in ecstacy.

I swayed from one direction to another

I was replete with love

I was engrossed, entrapped, enslaved.

I didn’t want to stop

I couldn’t.

My father stood behind me, looking at her, singing in His glory.

And He smiled.

His grace on Her.

PS: This was inspired by the dancing flame that swayed in sync to the song of this lady.


Diaries of the Hechicera: Clash

She did enough to conceal herself. She had no interest in herself. All she knew was to work, work and work. She had clung on to work to make minutes pass in her life – so that those thoughts wouldn’t come back and torment her. She was always walking around with puffy face, dragging her feet exactly the same way that she was dragging her life.

He was a workaholic. Night, day, weekday, weekend – he’d be at work. Did he ever sleep? Did he ever do what normal people do – like going to the movies?? Did he not have friends? Did he not network? What and who is he?? Arrogant, haughty and detestable.

She entered the office, dark because it was a Saturday and there was no one. From the corner of her eye, the cabin at the corner seemed to be lit. Well, someone must have forgotten to switch it off on Friday. She headed towards the cabin to switch that light off. And there he was, working on his Mac.

Ridiculous!!! There are other people who are MAD like me???

Before she could retrace her steps, he lifted his eyes and caught her – greeted her, but in her mind, he caught her!! Oops. Okay, be civilised my dear. Greet him back. Where are your manners? She greeted him back and took her seat. She was aware of his presence all the while. Instead of the usual 3 hours, she just wrapped up in one, and sped off back home.

He wondered what was it about her that he felt like protecting? She exuded a very vulnerable vibe. Like a prey sitting ready for a predator to devour. And he looked around her. There were predators who he knew spoke really shabbily about her. Predators who thought she is a fool, who laughed behind her back at her sense (or lack of it) of fashion, the way she spoke, the way she worked – everything about her was a bad joke. Maybe that’s where the protective feeling came from. She was hurt. Very hurt. Her entire demeanour reflected that. Maybe not as hurt as him, but she was. He wondered what had happened in her life. He knew and recognised this work obsession of hers very well. He himself was part of the same boat.

Musical Monday: Scott Joplin’s “The Entertainer”

I have developed a very great liking for piano classics. I would like to share this one tune that my neighbor was practicing during my short stay in Singapore. I took some time googling it, but I got to know that this is one of the toughest tunes to play and students learning piano who can actually pull off this one, are considered experts and stalwarts in Piano.

Do listen to it and let me know how you felt. I will share more of my favorites in subsequent posts.

Dear Grandpa

I miss you.

You had set the foundation for our comfortable life, having come here with nothing and building everything from the scratch.

I remember how I used to play with your hair as a little child. You were so possessive with your hair and yet, whenever I felt like, I would get so many rubber bands and make little ponytails all over. You would check yourself in the small hand-held mirror and laugh.

I remember you started giving me pocket money every month when I turned 13. 200 rupees. I used to spend it in Archies – and would look forward to the next month.

I remember  how you were concerned about my health and that I am too skinny. I used to tease you by showing my non-existent biceps and you would burst out in laughter.

I remember how you would bring cartons of Goldspot and ThumsUp because we all loved them. You would also bring Cadbury’s Crackle, Dairy Milk and Fruit & Nut – again, cartons with 10 pieces so that we could eat them to our heart’s content!!

When I ventured out, you would be so concerned and would ask my mum how I am doing, whether I am eating well or not. You were so proud of me when I told you my salary and you just smiled from ear to ear.

When I came home two weeks back, seeing you in the condition that you were, brought me down to tears. I couldn’t resist sitting by your side and caressing your head. You caught hold of my hand tightly, as if to say, thank you – don’t go. When you refused to eat food, I coaxed you into opening your mouth so that I could push the food in. You had given up on life. I had to force water down your throat as you opened your lips a bit – you weren’t even ready to drink water!!

I ran to my dad and cried and cried – asking him if something could be done, but he said, no beta, this is life. He will get more harassed if we shift him to the hospital. Wistfully, I left for my job that Monday, and by Saturday, you were gone.

I got the phone call from dad while I was in a meeting Saturday early morning. I rushed home and cried and cried, thinking and thanking for coming home the previous week. I booked my tickets and when I reached home, seeing you, lying so peacefully inside the ice box, with an angelic smile on your face, broke my heart. You looked as radiant as alive. I wanted to touch you – but everyone had to come. Your last rites broke my heart again. As I bid farewell, I prayed that you would always watch over us, and forgive us for anything that we would have not been able to fulfill.

Daddy (as we call you), I love you, I miss you.

I am sad that you are no more, but grateful too, that your suffering has ended.

Stay with us in our memories and be there, our guardian angel.


2018 and beyond 

It’s been a year to remember.

My makeover. 

My transformation. 

The lady who moved from insecurity to confidence. 

What is transformed can not be rolled back. And shouldn’t be either. 

The journey is an endless one. Climbing the stairs of knowledge and growth, and in the process, becoming the persona of my true identity… My mentor always saw it through me. He knew my true identity. 

As 2018 rings the bells, i see myself on the threshold of the new, the unknown and the challenging. Yet, i am not scared. I don’t fear anything anymore. I am me. 

I have become me. I recognize myself now. I respect me now. 

2018 is going to be the journey of me. 

My explorations, my quests, my energies.

Wish me the best. 

Happy 2018

Blog Feature: Beauty Talks with Neha

She’s fun, she’s quirky, she’s awesome.

She’s a bomb packed in a little gift box.

That’s Neha for you.

She is a famous blogger who blogs at Beauty Talks with Neha. I have seen her from the days when we were standing in a New U store and I tried convincing her to buy a lip gloss from Lotus Herbals.

Acha tu khareedegi toh main bhi loongi – is what the little tomboy said. I said, Okay and we both bought the same color.

That little girl has now graduated to this awesome knee-weakening beauty that reviews makeup and beauty products. (Let me tell you a secret here – the products look great because SHE makes them look awesome).

She has been my sole friend, one who I met in a bus and we became friends forever. We can be with each other, or not be with each other but the feeling doesn’t change.

Okay, this blog was about Beauty Talks with Neha, although its really really tough to NOT talk about Neha.

All said and done, check out her blog here. You won’t be disappointed.

And trust me, she’s as beautiful by heart, as she is, in her videos. And her smile – innocence personified. And, she makes me smile. 🙂

Go meet her!!

Oh, and did I tell you she’s an enormously talented artist??? Her art is on sale.


An answer-less question

Juz thinking.. why no marriage of aadhar with voter card? If we want one and only one identity, then everything else must be removed.

How will a daily wage worker have a bank account?

Digital India is not just for the common man. It’s not just for the individual who has to stand in the lines for hours and hours to withdraw money that changed faces overnight. It’s not just for the little ones who are dying because their family’s name was struck off from welfare rolls for not having performed the “marriage” of aadhar with ration card.

It’s also for the ruling who have been able to settle down on “that” chair because these very same people had chosen them to rule. They chose, not for starving to death, not for being forced to have empty bank accounts, not for struggling to get new money, not for being threatened that their bank accounts will be discontinued, not for having to shell out taxes on basic needs that are “unclear”, “vague” and “dynamic”, not for women who pay more because sanitary napkins got dearer, not for the weaver whose fabric anyway has lost demand, not for manufacturers who are already hit because of imports, not for witnessing preferential treatment to those on the high chairs, not to suffer unplanned and disillusioned overnight decisions, not to just endlessly suffer.

It’s also for the ruling to first address the starved, the sick, the struggling and provide basic needs. One wouldn’t want to keep a little shack clean on an empty stomach. True, there are people – educated for that matter – who litter. But there is a higher percentage that has nothing to even litter. In fact, some find food from litter. Isn’t that a shame? Making life easier for the common man seems to be the last in the list of the ruling. However, do note that this is not meant to be an absolute statement.

It’s also for the ruling to first address the sectors that are draining money rather than penalize everyone and create more money. Reducing wastage is also saving money. Improving efficiency is also saving money. When you and I and everyone else is clearly showing where we are spending our money, then the ruling is also supposed to show where they are spending “our” money. Wouldn’t that be fair?

Anyway, I am not for or against anyone and am also aware of the positive changes that have happened – although very few and I am not sure if the effect of positive overrides the effect of negative, or vice versa? I started off as a thought, and didn’t plan to write so much – but, I guess there was a lot in mind that needed to be expressed. I am worried though. Really worried. Is the place where the Aadhar identities are kept secured enough? That and several apprehensions.

And even now, my question remains unanswered.

Do you have an answer?