We have so many hangups in life.
We have our notions of good and bad. We believe being and doing A, B, C… and so on makes one a ‘good’ person, and doing X, Y, Z, and so on makes one a bad person. Well, in the dichotomy of the human mind, (a subject that deserves another looooooong post on its own), one oscillates between the feminine and masculine, the north pole and the south pole, the good and the bad, the in and the out, the receiving and the giving.
I can go on. I have grown wiser. I don’t think people are ‘good’ or ‘bad’. They are what they are. We are what we are. Who am I to judge someone and say, hey, you are bad because you did this? Who are you to tell me I am good, because I did that – whatever this this and that may be.
I care not. We allllllll are humans. Being human is being imperfect. And being imperfect is being human. Perfection comes in a robot. And hey, I don’t want to be a robot. Yeah, people disappoint me, make me cry, hurt me immensely and also cheer me up – but isn’t that what life is all about? Whoever called life a socalled ‘b****’ should think over twice and thrice about the fact that living is a beautiful exercise – breathing is a lovely feeling.
One round of a hospital and we thank for everything that we “do not” have – when do we do that otherwise? We thank God we don’t have aids, we thank God we are not maimed, we thank God we do not have to starve.
But otherwise, we don’t thank God for being healthy. We don’t thank God for being wealthy. We dont thank God for being wise. And trust me, being wise comes with its own nuances. Life is the sternest teacher I have ever come across (pssssttt… apart from my newest mentor who is like, really really really strict!!!). We love to gather attention on what we would love to hear. Time for a small story.
A little girl comes back from school, not able to take the fact that every other student in her class got the same attention as she. What does she do? Welllll… she comes home to see 3 more siblings – of different ages, getting their own fair shares of attention. And she puts on a drama. “No body loves me. I am no good. I am bad. People at school also do not talk to me. My teacher does not talk to me.” Any guesses what she is doing? Wellllll… grabbing and gathering attention. Simple. Reinstating her own ‘ego’ by making everyone around her say, “Oh no baby, you are sweet, you are good. How can anyone not talk to you baby? Look! I am talking to you. Dad is talking to you. Brother is getting you sweet meats. Ah, you are a lucky baby. No baby, don’t cry. You are good.”
🙂 Purpose solved, enough to go on for another month. And then one more public tantrum. For some more ego-stroking.
Ah, kids can do it so well!!!
But don’t we as adults do something similar too? My mentor Prof. Sampath calls it psychodrama. He loves the word. He loves the nuances that come with the word – psychodrama. For him, a baby’s tantrum to an adult Chairman’s board meeting encompass what he calls psychodrama. I miss my mentor a lot. He taught me how to be strong and how to fight it out.
End of the day, we also became a part of the so-called psychodrama in our own lives. But this is what I love about life, and I am sure Sampath ji will agree that life wouldn’t unfold if there was no psychodrama unfurling into a fully bloomed flower at every nook of the road of life.
Being human, making mistakes, hurting others, hurting self, seeking attention, playing out the child in you – all these are very basic to human nature, something that no one teaches us in life.
Being very fortunate to have great mentors, I have come a long way.
And I rest.
I am human.