An answer-less question

Juz thinking.. why no marriage of aadhar with voter card? If we want one and only one identity, then everything else must be removed.

How will a daily wage worker have a bank account?

Digital India is not just for the common man. It’s not just for the individual who has to stand in the lines for hours and hours to withdraw money that changed faces overnight. It’s not just for the little ones who are dying because their family’s name was struck off from welfare rolls for not having performed the “marriage” of aadhar with ration card.

It’s also for the ruling who have been able to settle down on “that” chair because these very same people had chosen them to rule. They chose, not for starving to death, not for being forced to have empty bank accounts, not for struggling to get new money, not for being threatened that their bank accounts will be discontinued, not for having to shell out taxes on basic needs that are “unclear”, “vague” and “dynamic”, not for women who pay more because sanitary napkins got dearer, not for the weaver whose fabric anyway has lost demand, not for manufacturers who are already hit because of imports, not for witnessing preferential treatment to those on the high chairs, not to suffer unplanned and disillusioned overnight decisions, not to just endlessly suffer.

It’s also for the ruling to first address the starved, the sick, the struggling and provide basic needs. One wouldn’t want to keep a little shack clean on an empty stomach. True, there are people – educated for that matter – who litter. But there is a higher percentage that has nothing to even litter. In fact, some find food from litter. Isn’t that a shame? Making life easier for the common man seems to be the last in the list of the ruling. However, do note that this is not meant to be an absolute statement.

It’s also for the ruling to first address the sectors that are draining money rather than penalize everyone and create more money. Reducing wastage is also saving money. Improving efficiency is also saving money. When you and I and everyone else is clearly showing where we are spending our money, then the ruling is also supposed to show where they are spending “our” money. Wouldn’t that be fair?

Anyway, I am not for or against anyone and am also aware of the positive changes that have happened – although very few and I am not sure if the effect of positive overrides the effect of negative, or vice versa? I started off as a thought, and didn’t plan to write so much – but, I guess there was a lot in mind that needed to be expressed. I am worried though. Really worried. Is the place where the Aadhar identities are kept secured enough? That and several apprehensions.

And even now, my question remains unanswered.

Do you have an answer?

 

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An adventure

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Yes, thank you, that’s mine.

I have been wanting to buy a sewing machine for quite some time. Yesterday, I ventured out to do just that. The store is almost 25 kms from my home and Google decided to take me to a location where there was no store at all.

Now, let me tell you the whole story. I usually travel by cab but on Friday evening, there were no cabs available so I booked an auto. While I set out towards my home, I decided to instead go into the city interiors to find a sewing machine store. So I told the auto walla to take me into city instead as I want to buy a sewing machine. The auto walla, after pondering for some time, told me, “Madam, if you want to buy a sewing machine, you must buy it from X Shop in Y area. That shop is the biggest 3 floor store and you will find all kinds of machines there. I bought one for my wife 5 years ago, and she is still using it – the machine has never required a servicing till date.”

Wow, you can imagine my elation – I was like, “God, give me a rose, and a rose fell into my lap!!” So, I asked him to take me there the next day. He was a genuine simpleton and he agreed – although I wasn’t so sure that he would come, I reconfirmed with him.

The next day, he came right as he said, at 11.30 and we set out. Now, I had no idea that this Y area would be sooooooooo far away that it would feel like going to another city!!! Okay, so, throughout, the auto walla was narrating his story to me, about how he had worked hard and the cabs have beat their income down. I felt sorry for good hearted people like him, and prayed that he would prosper, in spite of the fact that I didn’t have great impressions about auto wallas in general.

It was about 12.30 when we reached. And right as he said, the shop was a large one – but the company of machines was local. And the price they quoted was HUGE. I thought, if I had to pay that much, I would rather buy an Usha Machine than a local one.

So again, I googled and to my luck, there was another distributor who stocked usha machines in the same area!!! So off I went, the auto, zipping through streets and sabzi markets and controlled parking areas to reach this place. And, the man was educated, well meant and showed me a lot of models. I chose one, and he quoted 9500, came down to 8500 and still, earned over 2000 profit because I did not have the great uncommon common sense to check the MRP on the box. He unboxed and fit it into the table – BTW, I insisted on the wheels option WITHOUT a motor. I am quite a stickler for traditional jooni purani stuff that way.

So, the guy said it would take about an hour to set it up. The kind auto walla was so cooperative, he said he will wait. It was 2.30 by that time and I was hungry. There was a small canteen kinda shop in the corner of the building and I headed over there to find something to eat. I asked the auto walla as well if he’d like to eat something. He declined, but said, he would drink some tea. So I ordered puri bhaji for myself and two teas.

The whole idea of this post came because THAT tea was the MOST tastiest tea in my city till date – trust me, no Tea Place or Cafe or Barista or any Chai place could serve as good a tea as this one!!! I am a Tea maniac and can have even 20 cups a day, without missing food. So, this one got a 10 on 10 – the proportion was jussst perfect. Not too much milk or sugar. The problem with tea EVERYWHERE else is that they serve it with 80 to 90% milk – which kills the whole point of tea. The way I drink it is to add a few teaspoons of milk in a cup of black tea.

That said, the task of fitting the machine into the auto was a huuuge one. I squeezed myself in a corner next to the machine and we set out. Another hour’s journey and by 4.30 I was home.

What a day!! And for 3 years now, I have wanted to buy a sewing machine – yes, I have a full time job, I intend to keep it, and no, I am not crazy. I am just too creative to not keep my fingers from fidgeting!! And, I am nurturing dreams of a big little business. 🙂 Yes, going my Dad’s way. I think.

So, wish me the bestest of good lucks, folks and friends.

I am on a new journey – yet again!!

What it means being an Empath

I didn’t know that I am an Empath.

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As I move ahead on my spiritual path and discover new things about myself in this journey, I have received a lot of answers to questions that I always had, and to those that I never had either.

I will try my best to share this journey with you, maybe one of you will identify with it, who knows?

  1. Songs affect me in a huge way. I can not bear to listen to some songs (esp from the oldies lot like Kishore Kumar’s) because they make me depressed.
  2. Deja Vu is a common phenomenon with me, because I tend to have the feeling of “I’ve been here before”, or “I’ve seen him/her before” quite often.
  3. Pink skies make me depressed and a bit scared as well.
  4. I am highly highly sensitive and tend to pick up vibes very quickly. (To my deepest chagrin, at work, I am just the opposite..!!!!)
  5. I like/do not like cities or places according to the vibes I get.
  6. I tend to immediately catch the feelings of a person around me if they are sad, depressed or in grief.
  7. I cry a lot… a lot means really a lot. Every emotion results in tears – joy, sorrow, grief, anger, irritation, upset – every damn emotion and the tears flow.
  8. When someone shares their feelings with me, I suffer along with them because those feelings and emotions become me and I become them. This is the worst trait I have.
  9. Hate crowds. Hate empty stores too. Extremes.
  10. These movies disturbed me very badly: Trapped, Life, Alien Covenant – you get the point.
  11. Long conversations, especially with acquaintances tire me out. I can’t sustain long phone conversations either.
  12. Loud noises, loud speakers, screaming people etc. disturb me and drive me to madness. So also, I get startled easily, even by something as small as the ringing of a phone – I jump out of my seat. There have been times when I actually dropped the phone when it started ringing.
  13. I can NOT multitask. Neither physically not mentally. Conversely, I can read two books parallelly – but each a bit at a time, I can switch from reading to painting to crochet to cooking faster than a butterfly switching flowers.
  14. I need time out after social get togethers, not that I go to too many of them.
  15. I have this very strong innate desire to heal others. Like I sometimes wish I had a magic wand to do that.
  16. You can NOT force me to do what I do not want to do. If you force me, I will feel suffocated.
  17. I am always disturbed by injustice. If I see any injustice happening around me, I have to hold the urge to get involved and give a piece of my mind. (My latest anger is directed towards Mr. Modi for coming up with privacy-killing ideas such as compulsory registration of marriages. What will women in our society do? He is so insensitive to women. My second latest is against trolls who want to keep pestering people who have no interest in them.)
  18. Many times, I feel emotions that I have no idea where they have come from. I go down without reason, I am happy without reason… I have no idea what touches me during my course of the day.
  19. You may have hurt me profusely and you may have back-stabbed me, but I will reach out if I know you are in pain. And I beat myself up for it, because it is the most vulnerable thing to do – put yourself up for more pain with people who do not value you.
  20. And of couse, I am drawn to healing modalities. Obviously.

That makes 20 of them.

 

Turning back

She found his sister-in-law walking down the street opposite to her house. It had been 8 years since she had seen any of his family members. Debating whether to avoid or not, she found her approaching. In her heart, she missed the friendship she had shared with his sister. It was an easy-going friendship, one that was without judgement. She called her ‘didi’, and not ‘bhabhi’. She did not want to bring the ‘weight’ of a bhabhi-wala relation into the simple sisterly friendship.

As didi approached, she hugged her, reminiscing the days gone by. Didi took her to her house, where there were a lot of people buzzing around, maybe for a wedding that was planned in the house. She felt amiss. Didi took her to a room and asked her to wait. On the other side of the room, she felt a presence. Ma. She jumped in surprise, went ahead and hugged ma too. Touched feet. Ma was distanced and detached. She handed me a letter. A handwritten letter.

She just took and just gave it a listless glance. No expression. When she went to her room, she found him there. She had forgiven him and had no weight in her heart. So, she greeted him politely.  Apparently, they all wanted him and her to get back together. She thought in her heart, that it was a foolish wishful want. She debated whether to cut this conversation short or see what he had to say. Curiosity took over and she took a seat 5 feet away from him. They spoke about inconsequential things. Then his intention was to move on to personal chat, but she sensed it and cut him short. She wanted to leave, but he got angry. All she said was, “You are still the same. Lower your temper.”

And she went to her parents to tell them to go and ask that family to move on. What did she achieve from that conversation? Not sure, maybe she had the satisfaction of knowing that it was the right thing to do, to walk out. Rather, to accept that he walked out. That a piece of paper with two signatures mean nothing when someone does not want to nurture a relationship. And of course, vice versa.

She thought of the man she now had in her life. Dynamic, mature and extremely loving. She thanked her stars. A small smile escaped her lips.

Track 2:

In her words:

The wedding atmosphere suddenly turned into tension filled melee. She was puzzled. Then people came running and shouting that the groom has halted the wedding celebrations because he wanted 10 lakhs immediately. The bride’s parents tried to ask our parents to arrange for the money. And fools that they are, they way they chose that man for me, they scrambled around, arranging for it.

I asked them to stop the madness. Just. Stop. It.

How dare that girl not stop this by taking a stand?? This for God’s sake is the 21st century. Educated people do NOT blackmail the bride’s family for money on the altar of marriage. What stops her from walking out? Is it okay to see her parents begging others for money? Is it okay to see the elderly couple scrambling around, and losing their wits on something as inconsequential as “buying a groom for their daughter”????

Track 3:

She wakes up with a jolt, angry and upset. Why after so many years, did she see this dream? Perhaps somewhere in her psyche, she expected him to come and apologize to her. And perhaps, somewhere in her psyche, she wants all those girls to stand up for their parents, who feel they are a victim of the society’s demands for sending a daughter with loads of materialistic things, with or without demand.

Track 4:

She thought of her parents who had the strength that ONLY true love could give, to support and in fact, help her in the brave decision she took so many years ago. She smiled as she saw the way her father’s head held high, when she told him of the salary hike she recently got. He is one proud father – he has seen her move from being a meek domestic girl to a confident corporate lady.

She immediately picked up her phone, and dialled Papa.

Smiling Female Business Leader With Arms Crossed