Secrets

Sometimes, I still wonder.

I did move on.

But I still want to know the secrets.

Why were they kept away from me?

Maybe I want to see repentance.

Maybe I want to close the loop.

Today, I am strong.

And balanced too.

I feel sad – that I can’t see anyone in trouble.

Foolish me, I keep dreaming of her – why?

Foolish me, I keep thinking he will apologise. Why?

Foolish me, I wonder what happened – why?

Foolish me, I feel sad about his depression – is it bipolar? is it schizophrenia?

I don’t know. Maybe I shouldn’t know. Maybe I should.

It’s gone. All gone. Gone. Gone. Gone.

Peace.

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Diaries of a Hechicera: Meet me ;-)

Hechicera means Enchantress – one who can put a spell on you with her qualities.

Today, Hechicera reveals herself.
She is the girl next door , the girl of your dreams, the lady in your fantasies.

She is a dreamer, a compulsive dreamer. She is inside you – the person who has always wished for the moon and the stars. She lives in her own world, she has her own language, she sings her own songs…

She has nothing to do with the big bad world. In her little world, there is only love, affection, kindness and gentleness. She does not want to leave her world. She wants to stay there forever. She wants her friends and her love to join her in her world. She wants to keep them away from the big bad world.

Call her Maya. She is Maya – the lady who danced in green fields in the white dress.. her dupatta flowing with the winds… her arms dancing to the enchanting tune… she is your imagination.

She is on a journey towards the Unknown. But she has faith that the Unknown will be where her heart is. She is constantly searching for the elusive someone. She is searching for her heart. She thinks the destination will be the start of another journey. If you follow her, she will crumble away into nothingness. If you try to touch her,she will melt away. If you want her, you can never have her. If you already have her, you can never lose her. She – is Hechicera.

Here’s my question to you, my lovely readers.

Who is YOUR Hechicera? Why is she your Hechicera?

Let us see you answer this one. I would like to know who Maya is for all of you out there reading this fantasy story.

Diaries of the Hechicera: The love she knew and the love that grew

His face was not very clear

There was dream upon dream
She waited eternally for him to appear
But her dream was still a dream

“O! Please please come soon, dear
Come and take over my life
I want to see you, touch and hear!
The stories of your life and strife.”

She would beckon in her dream
To that hazy not-so-clear face
And imagine him standing close to her
Real close, like a miracle on a good day.

The love she finally knew, twice,
Was ugly and wild, for all that she grew

Her hopes, aspirations, all the anticipation,
Everything lost, evaporated like summer dew.

Little did she know that this was not to be
For there in time, waiting, was someone worthy
She knew not, the test of her lord,
She was being groomed to become adored
She imagined her life, disintegrating, bit by bit
Her fate was, in truth, being sealed in the right orbit.
And her life was being set so so right.

Her destiny took her to true love
The love she knew earlier was a hallucination cove.
She thought she had seen it all
But the truth struck her with his arrival.
There he came, her Knight in shining armor, riding the sea waves
His arrival was so calm, absolutely a wonder

He came, bruised and battered, soul searching
Found solace in her suffering and healing.
She gave him what he missed, he gave her love

He gave her what she missed, she gave him trust.

Had their fates been sealed earlier? One does wonder.
When the universe decides to give the love u knew
Is there anything else that you wish to do?
You start believing that it is a circle
Life falls into its destined oracle

Why do you think it was over then?
Because, it’s never over, ever.

There was another story in the offing
The story had someone and you starring
The Love she knew, was the love that grew
The love he deserved was the love she gave

And they lived, happily ever after.
And they lived, happily ever after.

How was A Walk born?

I have been blogging since 2007. My first blog was on a platform called Sulekha.com and that was the time I was exploring blogging and networking online. I found very good friends on Sulekha and I am in touch with them even now.

I named my blog Dreamz Forever, and used to blog under the name Punam. Dreamz Forever gained a lot of popularity. I built it initially on Blogger.com and then shifted it to WordPress for WP is no doubt a better platform. When I was Punam, I was a different person, the typical dreamy girl who was always looking to fly high. I still am, but in a different shade.

Life happened. And I went into hibernate mode for about a year, before resurfacing as A Walk into the Woods. A Walk into the Woods is one of my earlier poems and defines me to the core. I decided to name my new blog this, because it is ingrained in my memory and there was nothing else more important than A Walk into the Woods.

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Krishna Verma, whose interview I published on my blog, gave me the name Avyuka. Avyukta means as clear as crystal, and it describes me perfectly. So I adapted it as my name on A Walk, and appended Punam so that my readers who have been there for so many years recognize me.

Each name signifies a personality within me. It is true that you are never today, what you were yesterday. Your today is yesterday plus something you learned yesterday, and you have evolved, even if it is one day or the next moment. Every thought that comes in your mind adds to your personality and if you introspect, you will realize that you are evolving in a way that is defining you as a person.

So, thus was A Walk born, and I can’t believe that I have just crossed 200 followers. I thank all of you for reading me, my rants, hobbies, posts and all.

Now that you know how this blog came about, let me tell you that I got inspired to share this story from TalkaholicMe’s blog.

So, what’s your blog’s story?

 

She finds her wings – Water Color Painting

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First glance, this painting will remind you of an angel.

But I see it as the WOMAN who found her wings and is ready to fly.

The woman who breaks her shackles and escapes to freedom land

The woman who fights back and leaves her past behind

The woman who became a man and took all onus on her shoulders

The woman who decided to give life to uplifting of souls

The woman

The invincible, unstoppable woman.

Dedicated to #IAMPINK and #PARCHED. 

Diaries of the Hechicera: Bleeding Roses

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Image Credit: Nicolas Raymond

In my mind’s eye, I envisioned a story that had no beginning,
Years and years of wait, is what I could only imagine.
Life’s most fruitful years, one by one just disappeared
Left me wondering, wandering, perplexed and tired.
It’s raining bleeding roses. Know it. It’s raining bleeding roses.

In my sweet innocent little heart, I heard a heartbeat whisper,
It questioned, in doubt, finally!! Will the wait be over?
And I really really thought, it would be,
So I convinced my innocent heart, hour after hour.
It was raining bleeding roses, I didn’t know. It was raining bleeding roses.

There they were, the heart and mind, rejoicing a tad bit early,
For in store for them, was a story that would leave them both gory.
I had no answer, nothing to tell them, their eyes reflecting hurt deep,
For they felt that I had betrayed them, beyond repair, ruthlessly.
Would you please tell them I hadn’t known, it rained bleeding roses?

Would you? You? and You? Please explain, clarify for me?
I am as innocent as a child’s playful glee?
I had no vendetta, I had no theory,
I hadn’t any big wishes, except for joys and a bit of cheer.
I knew not, truly, dear heart, we had bleeding roses in store.

Stories that have no beginnings, tales without endings,
That start lonely, and end lonely, they rain bleeding roses.
Of hearts that cry and learn to live alone and stop questioning,
They just keep sucking manna out of solitary trysts, always beckoning.
They know now, that life will always rain bleeding roses.

Know it, heart. Know it, mind. It’s always going to rain,
And rain it will, in soft and tender, beautiful bleeding roses.

Diaries of a Hechicera

I used to write this series called Diaries of a Hechicera in my other blog. I was going through the other blog, reading some old blogs and feeling really really wistful – but I decided to start this series on A Walk into the Woods again.

Hechicera has grown up – she has seen enough in life to understand that a la-la land does not exist. She carries some mishaps from her past, some difficult to handle consequences that will remain with her forever.

Hechicera loves life today. She has learnt to accept and believe that dreams will come true only if one lives in the real world. That there is no one who will make her happy and that happiness has to come from within.

She has days when she is so down that lifting her up is herculean. But she has learnt to manage it and she has learnt to accept herself with all her good things and faults. She looks at life today with a top of the mountain view and understands that she is just a small speck in the huge abundant universe.

*Hechicera means enchantress.