Posted in #life, A walk into the woods, About Me, Journey under a starry night, Love, Memories, ocean, Relationships, romance, sea, Togetherness, walk into the woods, wishes

Alive

The Mystery Behind, Beyond, and Beneath the Sea, weaves a Poem of Awe.

Every Wave, Ripple, Ebb and Flow seems to confirm, “I. Am. Alive.”

When dreams come true, this is how exhilarating you feel.

I started my journey with Dreamz Forever in 2007. It’s been 11 long years of amazing growth, struggles, learning, highs and lows.

What’s stayed is the little girl inside me.

She feels amazingly alive today.

Posted in A Success Story, Abhi to main chhoti hoon, An Angel for a guardian angel, Challenges, Desire, happiness, Inevitable, Let me breathe atleast now, Love, Memories, My Art, Uncategorized, wisdom, wishes

An adventure

IMG-20171029-WA0020

Yes, thank you, that’s mine.

I have been wanting to buy a sewing machine for quite some time. Yesterday, I ventured out to do just that. The store is almost 25 kms from my home and Google decided to take me to a location where there was no store at all.

Now, let me tell you the whole story. I usually travel by cab but on Friday evening, there were no cabs available so I booked an auto. While I set out towards my home, I decided to instead go into the city interiors to find a sewing machine store. So I told the auto walla to take me into city instead as I want to buy a sewing machine. The auto walla, after pondering for some time, told me, “Madam, if you want to buy a sewing machine, you must buy it from X Shop in Y area. That shop is the biggest 3 floor store and you will find all kinds of machines there. I bought one for my wife 5 years ago, and she is still using it – the machine has never required a servicing till date.”

Wow, you can imagine my elation – I was like, “God, give me a rose, and a rose fell into my lap!!” So, I asked him to take me there the next day. He was a genuine simpleton and he agreed – although I wasn’t so sure that he would come, I reconfirmed with him.

The next day, he came right as he said, at 11.30 and we set out. Now, I had no idea that this Y area would be sooooooooo far away that it would feel like going to another city!!! Okay, so, throughout, the auto walla was narrating his story to me, about how he had worked hard and the cabs have beat their income down. I felt sorry for good hearted people like him, and prayed that he would prosper, in spite of the fact that I didn’t have great impressions about auto wallas in general.

It was about 12.30 when we reached. And right as he said, the shop was a large one – but the company of machines was local. And the price they quoted was HUGE. I thought, if I had to pay that much, I would rather buy an Usha Machine than a local one.

So again, I googled and to my luck, there was another distributor who stocked usha machines in the same area!!! So off I went, the auto, zipping through streets and sabzi markets and controlled parking areas to reach this place. And, the man was educated, well meant and showed me a lot of models. I chose one, and he quoted 9500, came down to 8500 and still, earned over 2000 profit because I did not have the great uncommon common sense to check the MRP on the box. He unboxed and fit it into the table – BTW, I insisted on the wheels option WITHOUT a motor. I am quite a stickler for traditional jooni purani stuff that way.

So, the guy said it would take about an hour to set it up. The kind auto walla was so cooperative, he said he will wait. It was 2.30 by that time and I was hungry. There was a small canteen kinda shop in the corner of the building and I headed over there to find something to eat. I asked the auto walla as well if he’d like to eat something. He declined, but said, he would drink some tea. So I ordered puri bhaji for myself and two teas.

The whole idea of this post came because THAT tea was the MOST tastiest tea in my city till date – trust me, no Tea Place or Cafe or Barista or any Chai place could serve as good a tea as this one!!! I am a Tea maniac and can have even 20 cups a day, without missing food. So, this one got a 10 on 10 – the proportion was jussst perfect. Not too much milk or sugar. The problem with tea EVERYWHERE else is that they serve it with 80 to 90% milk – which kills the whole point of tea. The way I drink it is to add a few teaspoons of milk in a cup of black tea.

That said, the task of fitting the machine into the auto was a huuuge one. I squeezed myself in a corner next to the machine and we set out. Another hour’s journey and by 4.30 I was home.

What a day!! And for 3 years now, I have wanted to buy a sewing machine – yes, I have a full time job, I intend to keep it, and no, I am not crazy. I am just too creative to not keep my fingers from fidgeting!! And, I am nurturing dreams of a big little business. 🙂 Yes, going my Dad’s way. I think.

So, wish me the bestest of good lucks, folks and friends.

I am on a new journey – yet again!!

Posted in questions, Verses n Rhymes, wisdom, wishes

Miles to go before I sleep

I really want to sleep… a sound relaxing peaceful sleep
There is so much to do… so much to do…
Unforeseen, unknown territories, dark blackholes
Labyrinths out of which there is no escape
And yet, responsibilities, I have promises to keep.

How can I sleep if I don’t those promises keep?
How can I sleep?
Nothing else matters. Everything seems so small..
My dreams that once appeared so big and close..
Aren’t even visible to me today at all

All got left behind, a moment before I entered this maze
A maze that has perilous twists and turns
One that I have to traverse, with  no choice
This maze that shocks at every turn and twists your insides
All got left behind, everything seems so small now

I look at myself in the mirror and see a meager insignificant dot
A shadow of an insignificant soul, helpless, hapless
Yet, that soul is going to be the foundation of a survival
That soul is going to become the beacon
That is the destiny I have chosen for myself

Nothing else matters … anymore
And so, I have miles to go before I sleep…
But I look forward to that peaceful sleep

Posted in #life, Food for Thought, happiness, lessons, Love, questions, Relationships, romance, Series, Verses n Rhymes, wishes

Diaries of the Hechicera: Bleeding Roses

In my mind’s eye, I envisioned a story that had no beginning,
Years and years of wait, is what I could only imagine.
Life’s most fruitful years, one by one just disappeared
Left me wondering, wandering, perplexed and tired.
It’s raining bleeding roses. Know it. It’s raining bleeding roses.

In my sweet innocent little heart, I heard a heartbeat whisper,
It questioned, in doubt, finally!! Will the wait be over?
And I really really thought, it would be,
So I convinced my innocent heart, hour after hour.
It was raining bleeding roses, I didn’t know. It was raining bleeding roses.

There they were, the heart and mind, rejoicing a tad bit early,
For in store for them, was a story that would leave them both gory.
I had no answer, nothing to tell them, their eyes reflecting hurt deep,
For they felt that I had betrayed them, beyond repair, ruthlessly.
Would you please tell them I hadn’t known, it rained bleeding roses?

Would you? You? and You? Please explain, clarify for me?
I am as innocent as a child’s playful glee?
I had no vendetta, I had no theory,
I hadn’t any big wishes, except for joys and a bit of cheer.
I knew not, truly, dear heart, we had bleeding roses in store.

Stories that have no beginnings, tales without endings,
That start lonely, and end lonely, they rain bleeding roses.
Of hearts that cry and learn to live alone and stop questioning,
They just keep sucking manna out of solitary trysts, always beckoning.
They know now, that life will always rain bleeding roses.

Know it, heart. Know it, mind. It’s always going to rain,
And rain it will, in soft and tender, beautiful bleeding roses.

Pic Source

 

PS: This is what I would call, one of my twilight poems – something I wrote just before going into a deep disturbed sleep. I wrote about it here.

Copyright 2012 Punam J R All rights reserved.

Posted in #life, Flame of Peace, Food for Thought, happiness, lady, Relationships, romance, Verses n Rhymes, wisdom, wishes

The storm kept brewing

Hell!! A woman scorched…

Fury!! In those eyes, blood-shot

Despair!! The lost smile

Grief!! The shattering sound of trust

Dismay!! In denial

Tears!! Just don’t stop

Maddening!! That cocky smile

Disbelief!! Oh no, NOT again!!

Sighsss!! Giving up

Palms up!! Hands outstretched

Godd!! Call upon me

Life!! Not anymore

Memories!! GO away!

No!! This can’t be true.

God!! Not againnnnnnn

You can’t do this to me, no way.

Can we give the woman some independence please?

 

There is a small population of women who are fortunate to see a life that is not bound by umpteen ropes and shackles. But for the rest, life for her, is like this:

1. Superstitions that make her “do things” based on which, she will supposedly get a “good partner”.

2. Myths, and stigma that objectify her and strangulate her in robes because she is a commodity that should always be covered…

3. Strange customs that she is made to follow so that “other people” can live a comfortable life.

4. Patriarchs stopping her from getting her share of education because she is a woman – HER being itself being a crime.

5. Expectations that make her “bear” stuff because women are supposed to “bear” and “bear” and “not say a word.”

6. Submission to one and all, all and sundry.

7. Squash her dreams because she is not allowed to dream.

8. Always everyone else’s wishes before hers.

9. Her self-respect stays last.

and I can keep continuing…

But my only question is,

when will SHE be truly free?

Will she ever be allowed to take her own decisions, for her happiness?

Will she ever be asked, “What does your heart desire? Let us do that today.”

Will she ever be told, “For you. You want it that way. So be it.”

 

 

Posted in #life, Food for Thought, Friends, happiness, Inspiration, lessons, Love, love msgs, questions, Relationships, romance, Verses n Rhymes, walk into the woods, wishes

Unsettled

It was a hot summer noon
As I approached the city
Horses greet me on the way,
Pulling a royal chariot away..
Unsettled.

A mission to seek
An abode meek
Nothing great,
Just a humble piece.
Unsettled.

Wandered, hour after hour
Long days turned into longer nights
I would see myself staring into space
Wondering when life would take pace
Unsettled.

I miss those days, when we were two
Hand in hand, our dreams we drew
Sapne dekhogi nahin toh poore kaise honge
(If you don’t have dreams in the first place,
How will you fulfill them?)
Was all you said, and I KNEW… Yet,
Unsettled.

I have to stay calm, the test of time
Time is for sure, the best healer
As I live my life in bits n pieces,
I dream away…
Unsettled.

I live a life of fragments
Each fragment an eternity
So u see, kind sire, thou art eternities away from me
WHEN oh when do you plan to appear…
Unsettled.

Stars twinkling in my eyes,
I gaze at the moon-less sky
I see your perfect features
And wonder we are so far, why
Unsettled.

Rain drops falling on my face
I used to love them so
Will we see them together
While the soft breeze flows
Unsettled.

As I build an empty home
With trinkets and junkets of stuff
I see myself wandering through
A life of no consequence…
Unsettled.

I feel overtly unsettled
With tensions unbridled
Like a note in a bottle at sea
tossing and turning with waves,
Unsettled.

Not knowing who will read the note,
Pray, will a prince appear?
Out of nowhere to read me and my heart,
And take me to the shores, in arms cosseted..
Until then,
Unsettled. Period.

Posted in #life, Fantasy, Fiction, happiness, Inspiration, lessons, Love, love msgs, Series, Uncategorized, walk into the woods, wishes

Musical Monday: Sujal-Kashish

I hardly get to watch TV anymore. The other day, I decided, come what may, I want to watch a soap opera.. our very own hindi TV serial. So, I joined my room mate and occupied the single bed in the hall – to watch this serial called … (I dont even remember the name now) but it has the famous Kahaani Ghar Ghar Ki wali Parvati. 🙂 and Ram Kapoor in the lead.

Anyway, I bugged her to tell me the story so that i could understand this one half hour of the serial that I suddenly decided I had to watch!!! And then.. later on, I remembered how crazy I was over one particular serial during my college days. It was Kahiin Toh Hoga.. that serial about 5 sisters.. and Kashish the main lead, and Sujal and Piyush!! Ah, good old days.. we were so crazy about this couple… and we would just go ga ga over the kind of dresses Kashish wore.. whatever she wore would become the current fashion of that time.

She is a very beautiful girl.

So, for this Musical Monday, I wanted to post Sujal and Kashish’s moments together. 🙂

Just one regret – the best pair ruined their own careers for big screen dreams. They ruled the roost while they were on small screen.

Posted in hindi, Verses n Rhymes, wishes

>Meri Chaah

>

मेरी चाह

छोटे से दिल ने कई ख्वाब देखे थे
कई सालों तक उन्हें संजोकर रखे थे.
फिर आया वह पल जो उन ख़्वाबों को
कर देता, यदि सब ठीक तोह, हकीकत वह

हाय! क्या था मंज़ूर ख्हुदा को, यह न था पता,
उस छोटे से दिल को, ऐसे था कभी टूटना
एक आवाज़ तक नहीं हुई, एक आह तक न सुनी

किसी ने न पता चल सका किसी को, वह तकलीफ
दे रही थी दिल को ऐसी यातना
सह रहा था वह सब कुछ अकेले तनहा

ऐ खुदा यह क्या मज़ाक था, कैसा हास्य?
जिसमें पल पल रोना बिलखना था, ऐसा रहस्य
जीवन की पहेली हमें न समझ आई बिलकुल
यह कैसे थे कर्मों के पदचिह्न, आखिर?

मिटा देना चाहती हूँ, भुला देना चाहती हूँ
उन पदचिह्नों को लहरों के पानी से
नयी राह पर चलना चाहती हूँ
नए सपने बुनना चाहती हूँ
नया कल, नयी सुबह, नयी तमन्नाएं
सब कुछ मिटा कर, सब कुछ भुलाकर

फिर से जीना चाहती हूँ मैं
फिर से जीना चाहती हूँ मैं

Posted in #life, Love, Philosophy, Verses n Rhymes, wishes

>Mending Walls, Bending Rules

>This poem has been submitted to Jingle’s Poetry Potluck Week 17

Stars showered upon us
Planets changed course
The sun from the west rose
And you thought I didn’t care.

Yes, I did care.
I did not show it,
Of that I am aware.
But you thought, I didn’t care.

I had too many a blockade
One too many a heartache
But I had determined to pass the test.
And my heart led the rest.

Silence spoke, did you hear it?
I heard the silence speak.
It was a deafening sound.
No, I guess you weren’t around.

Blazes of past flew by.
Like arrows, and balls of fire
Some hit me, some didn’t.
I was determined to stand tall.

But why oh why are walls surrounding me?
Big tall long walls, castle-like stoned walls
I remain imprisoned behind them
Against my wishes to fly again.

Can I bend some rules too?
Can I escape into the skies blue?
Can I walk to the other side of the rainbow?
Can I touch the moon too?

Punam J R